Unworthy, Chosen, and Forgiven

I thought long and hard before I even imagined to write any book, but somehow people just kept telling me to write a book out of the blue. I started to write, and nothing came of it for over ten years. I have only made it to page 44 of my manuscript. My biggest question, which led to my real motivation to write, was "How can different people from different states I visited kept telling me the same thing? Could they all be wrong?" It was in March 2020, everything was shut down, I was in attendance at the AFFI mini-convention in Maryland, and it was closed down by the governor. Therefore, from all points in my life, God made sure that I would write. I was out of excuses and I just encouraged myself to write the movie-like book of my life. I have done many one-on-one, premarital, marriage pastoral feedback sessions, inside and outside the church. I only came to find out in some way, shape, or form that people have problems of sorts that were similar to my own. I think of myself as an unorthodox writer and now pastor/author that loves the truth with the desire to be a help for people. I now see a new parallel that was within me all along because my first passion was to become a doctor, so I could help people. More than half of my life have either been in the Air Force or working for the Department of Defense at the Pentagon in some type of full-time capacity. I even survived the war act of September 11 (911)! Yet I have a story to tell, starting from a dysfunctional family to chasing women, becoming a womanizer, stories of infidelity, unemployment, lying, stealing, divorce, bad credit, bankruptcy, gambling, and even several attempts to commit suicide! If the truth be told, I never thought that I would live past the age of thirty-five! While I thought that I was unworthy, I found out that God had chosen me to live again and to tell my story and to be the pastor that I am today! I was truly a lost soul! On this same path of my life, I have found redemption and a second chance to experience true and unconditional love in the form of Melody. A love that could have only been birthed by God's grace! Truly, my soul loves Jesus!